56 Fri 14/4/17: El Rinconcillo, Seville

Beer: Cruzcampo 5.0%

The oldest tapas bar in Seville (so presumably the world) was established in 1670. It’s aged well, and visibly. The walk up to The Rhinoceros (as we lazily call it) is the longest we do, but it’s worth it. Unlikely though it seems, I’d reckon chickpea and spinach is the best tapas dish bar none. The ham is also good, but I don’t indulge this time round – the sherry too is meant to be exceptional, but I’ve tried that once before and wasn’t sold.

There’s the nagging thought that the place is a tourist trap and, for all (and maybe because of) its heritage and patina, the place risks disappearing up its own arse – but a trip to Seville necessitates a trip to the Rhino.

The pub is split between two bars – we’ve only ever stood by the bar at the back (where Rick Stein and that Welsh bloke stood, on the telly) where there’s also a small number of tables and chairs. But the appeal is in the age and the tiles, the artistry of the bloke slicing the jamon, the chalk on the bar counter and the smug looking fat bloke – he’s still here then. My notes for this visit wonder whimsically if they could recreate this place if they tried. My notes doubt it.

35 Mon 10/4/17: Cafe Bar El Oasis, Malaga

Beer: Cruzcampo 5.0% (bottled)

Nice little unpretentious back street bar. No frills; plenty of tiles. Cruzcampo served from the bottle.

We've just been to an extraordinary "changing of the guard" type ceremony at the nearby Iglesia de Santo Domingo. Christ (on his cross) lying on the floor guarded by some soldiers who, after some stamping, shuffling, saluting and throwing rifles to one another, pass on the responsibility to their comrades. It's a little five minute (or less) ceremony, performed in front of an audience of a few dozen who (like us) waited about twenty minutes to see. Much of the Semana Santa has been solemn, impressive and on occasion effectively moving. This was high camp.

Back in the bar, other than tiles, the bar is decorated with several "half and half" scarves framed along with photos and tickets commemorating all the international football championships that Spain have won recently. From perennial underachievers, from a famously divided country, Spanish football have gone to multiply triumphs... all of which make England look increasingly ridiculous.