375. Wed 21/3/18: The White House, Luton

Beer: Sambrooks Flat White Stout 4.5%

Has the JDWWH had a post refurb makeover since my last visit? It seems somehow more warming and welcoming than usual. Maybe it’s just the unusually quiet and polite clientele at 05:30pm on a Wednesday.

The beer is delicious.

The tranquil mood is bludgeoned as Darren, a fellow we’ve known for thirty odd years arrives, and exuberantly takes us back to yesteryear: tales of acquaintances I’m not entirely sure we shared (“no… I’m sure I’d recognise him/her if I saw him/her”). Crazy days (NB: they weren’t that crazy, not for me). Darren’s still crazy. I’ve not changed in 25 years, he lies. He’s still in skinny fit jeans – and looking amazing.

Darren’s a force of nature, and his appearance smashes the air of quietly whimsical contemplation I try to maintain on the solo sneaky pint. He’s a lovely fella but, bloody hell…

On my way out Darren suggests we go out one night – “just you and me. We’ll f***ing smash it”. I’m naturally flattered/scared/confused/struck by awe and star.

122. Wed 21/6/17: The Bear Club, Luton

Beer: Leighton Buzzard Restoration 4.6%
Richard Herring gig; warm-up for his “Oh Flip I’m 50” Edinburgh show. I’m a podcast subscribing fan of Mr Herring, and me brother bought me a ticket for my birthday (although I don’t usually go for live comedy). It is stupidly hot outside, and inside, The Bear. The warm-up acts are forgettable, and the compere picks on just about everyone apart (mercifully) from me. He’s called David. He’s gay. Not seen him before but I’ve since seen him on a talking heads clip show – where he was required to be aghast at 70s TV content… ‘cause it was racist and sexist and almost certainly homophobic too.

Anyway, Richard Herring was good – the crowd were a bit rubbish though; he deserved better levels of enthusiasm than a hot and bothered Luton crowd could muster. Still, I was audience, I should have laughed louder and applauded when me brother tried to start a round (it didn’t take).

At the end of the show I procured a copy of Richard Herring’s book of emergency questions. I asked him to sign it to Timothy. I stopped at least twice on the way home to laugh at the questions therein.

187. Tue 3/10/17: La Cava Aragonesa, Benidorm

Beer: Mahou 5%

After a strangely bewildering wild goose chase (involving Steph’s folks, who aren’t going to meet us after all, and an apartment – which we can’t find – that they wanted us to look over on their behalf…) we end up back at the LCA. It’s nearing mid-afternoon.

This place is bright and bustling, and just a bit better in every respect from the local competition… anyway, the music is still too loud and cheesy… but what the heck.

This turns out to be our last visit to La Cava Aragonesa this time round.

152. Sat 19/8/17: Lansdowne Club, Luton

Beer: Fullers London Pride 4.0%

The search for Brickies pre-match alternatives (again, I quite like The Horse) continues, and this time its football Saturday membership at The Lansdowne. There’s quite a queue at the bar, and the range is very limited. That said, London Pride is perfectly acceptable and - slightly annoyingly - this place is fine too. There’s apparently no enthusiasm to match drinks with branded glassware, which is commendable. The LC is very civilised and genteel. I like it quite a lot which, again, slightly irks.

Not entirely sure why. Possibly it’s the paucity of decent boozers – very much highlighted by our forlorn schlep the previous night – which has led us into this fine establishment, which maybe isn’t ready (yet) to be patronised by the likes of us. Not that we’re in any way rowdy – but it does seem that we’ve been corralled into gate crashing someone else’s party.

379d Thu 29/3/18: The Cottage Loaf, Llandudno

Beer: Limestone Cowboy 4.5%

One of my favourite pubs here in Llandudno, either reasonably or very busy depending on the time of day. Can be an over propensity to reserve tables for eaters. Always a good selection of Welsh ales though. Bit dangerous to eat outside - seagulls will try and steal your food. I was over optimistic about the weather trying to push Spring along so ditched the jacket in favour of t-shirt/jumper combo. Bit of an error-bloomin' cold on the Pier. I'm not a cider drinker but the Welsh Black Dragon is a smooth flat drinkable cider (7.2%) which is rather appealing - the missus couldn't finish it.

363. Sun 18/3/18: Cerveceria el Tremendo, Seville

Beer: Cruzcampo 5.0%

An affable English speaking fellow at the party we gatecrashed in Cádiz (see episode 332) agreed that Cruzcampo is indeed an inferior product now – but there were still places in Seville that sold the good old traditional beer of yore. He gave us some names, which I jotted down in my Czech penguin notebook – and this is one of them.

There certainly seems to be something about this place. It looks clean and bright enough, but generally just bog standard – but it’s extremely popular with the locals. The bar probably has a long tradition as a community hub – but there are no shortage of establishments in this area (including El Rinconcillo, the oldest tapas bar in Seville, just round the corner), not many of which are nearly this busy… (El Rinconcillo is busier – but it is considerably bigger, and better represented on guide books and on telly).


I’m not sure about the beer. I don’t think it’s a relentlessly fizzy as normal, and maybe tastes a bit different/better. Stephanie remains sceptical of that opinion.

I’ve also noticed a sign saying “Cerveza Cruzcampo de barril” in this and, it turns out, several other places (including Casa Morales). The untranslated blurb I’ve managed to look up on the internet since does suggest at a non-pasteurised version – and this is probably it.

58. Fri 14/4/17: El Cangrejo, Seville

Beer: Cruzcampo 5%

Untrendy bar in Rinconcillo environs. The area is packed, but this place has ample room at the bar. It appears to be run by a young couple, whose kid sits on the beer kegs – tapping away, bored, on a device.

Nice tiles – too clean – no patina.

Suffice to say that this bar really wasn’t too noteworthy – although the notes that do exist convey some sympathy with the owners of an empty bar in a busy area. They also have a pop at their serving Cruzcampo, which seems more than a little uncharitable – what was I expecting? London Pride?

341. Thu 15/3/18: El Faro, Cádiz

Beer: Cruzcampo 5.0%

Superior fish restaurant in old town Cádiz. We’ve picked up this tip at the party on Tuesday night in the market (no.332), courtesy of the bloke who said Rick Stein really didn’t go to the best places on his long weekend in Cadiz programme. He might be right… we still love Rick (though not as much as Brian) Stein.

The man in the market advised us to go to the bar, not the restaurant. So we do.

The bar is posh but accommodating. The barman looks like he’d prefer to be waiting our table, but is friendly and courteous. Everyone, it seems, wants the tortillitas de camarones (prawn fritters). They arrive, and are fantastic – far better than the ones we’ve had previously. We also have deep fried anchovy and deep fried prawns.

We don’t see the restaurant of course, but the bar is immaculate. Not the kind of place, though, where you’d necessarily want to stick around if you’re not eating – but then the food is so good (and so deep fried) that you don’t want to be not eating.

Delicious. Not cheap. Best move on.

365. Sun 18/3/18: El Cangrejo, Seville

Beer: Cruzcampo 5.0%

Escape El Rinconcillo, which is a fantastic place – but too much, and back to the Cerverceria El Tremendo environs. Right next door to that – looking though it’s mostly employed to cater for the overspill from its more illustrious neighbour, is El Cangrejo.

We’ve been here before (see episode 58), and been somewhat underwhelmed. El Tremendo is small and basic, and El Cangrejo is a step down from that. It’s just a very small, nicely tiled and brightly lit, bar dispensing “Cerveza Cruzcampo de Barril”. This, I’m starting to believe, is the premium variety of the brew – as endorsed by the bloke in the market in Cadiz – that is only available in a handful of places: here, next door, Casa Morales etc.

It really does taste different… I try and persuade myself. Stephanie (and, to be honest, my age addled tastebuds) aren’t convinced.

Anyway the ceramic sign on the wall, which suggests they sell CCdB, leads me to believe that this bar has something going for it – so (whoever is running the place these days) is this time spared the pity I dumped upon it/them eleven months back.

306. Fri 23/2/18: The Castle, Luton

Beer: Robinson’s Trooper 4.8%

A No-mates Friday – so I decide on some early post-gym pints on Market Hill; the very centre of town, which we’ve yet to bother with this survey. The Crown had nothing but GKIPA and Doom Bar on. The Red Lion looked too bright, too packed – I looked through the window to see two redundant real ale pins, with no clips on.

The Castle has changed quite a bit over the years – back in the 90s it was The White Hart (aka The Wet Fart), before going mock Irish and eventually becoming this “rockers” pub. Every town needs at least one of these; it used to be The Bridge, and to a lesser extent The George II (apologies if my local cultural history is out in this respect), and it’s here now.

Typically, it’s alright: I’m a vague supporter, not necessarily a subscriber, to this form of obstinately alternative boozer (it’s the same kind of commitment level, though £8pcm cheaper, that I afford The Bear). The clientele is nicely eclectic; leaning toward the grungy (and grungy through the ages – millennials to OAPs). Some characters seem to be trying too hard, notably the lass extravagantly showing off her latest tatts. Meanwhile an aged couple are sat amongst a pile of shopping bags. They’ve been to Boots. They also own a small dog which yaps and jumps up at folk returning from the lavs. Victims laugh it off and/or antagonise the wretched tuft o’fur and teeth still further – before skulking back to their corner of the pub, muttering anti-canine curses under their breath. Saw that a couple of times.

Yappy snappy dogs, doing their feisty thing, may be fleetingly amusing - but a pub’s better off without it. The music, which I would almost certainly have found distracting if/when very much louder, is inoffensively dialled down at 7pm. The beer, Iron Maiden’s branded brew, is very decent. The Castle’s alright.

299. Wed 7/2/18: The Frog & Rhubarb, Luton

Beer: Batemans Gold 3.9%
Trouble is, you see, although mindful that a few publess days during the week is a good thing – when my father suggests we meet in the boozer, it never seems a terrible idea. My change of gymnasia regime from March will sort that out…

In the meantime, Greene King are taking the allure off, after all the good things I’ve suggested lately, by a rather lacklustre midweek selection. It’s the above or GKIPA. There’s a Sharps beer clip on a pump – with one of those labels which says that the beer in conditioning in the cellar. That surely suggests at a lack of timing and/or enthusiasm. Anyway, though it’s not good news for the punter, there’s probably sound financial grounding in a hostelry trumpeting beers they cannot as yet provide.
The Batemans Gold is alright, bright and hoppy… if this was a Slip End session, I’d be looking to take it on to The Rizz – or even embark on that wander to the Working Mans’ Club which I keep thinking about. London Pride a standard, I’m led to believe.

Dad arrives eventually – my sister and niece in tow. Another pint is procured, and we’re treated to part/page one of The Scary Camping Story (what will become) a 500 word thriller. Risking spoilers; the girls in the story are excited, but Leah voices her concerns about bears. And beasts. My favourite character is the teacher, Miss Pam.

We sup up and, before Toad in the Hole part 2 (a relative triumph), we then start a “clearing some space in the loft” project.

272a. Fri 29/12/17: The Duke of Wellington, London

Beer: Salopian Shropshire Gold 3.8%

London can be irritating. On a day when the price of a travelcard made me wince, the suspension of the North London line and the works around Highbury Corner meant a two hour journey to Dalston. When I got to the Wellington, service was snail paced. The evening was, however, saved once my chums turned up (Ched, then John the Sid, then Steve). And despite the slow service and titchy tiny pool room, I like the Wellington for its 'proper pub' feeling, despite some of its trendier clientele.

The pool was free. While we were playing a couple of blokes asked if it was 'winner stayed on'. We asked if it was ok if we played a couple more frames, then let them have the table. This was witnessed by a couple who'd come in to the titchy tiny pool room to watch the rugger. By the time we got to the bar and advised the blokes we'd finished, the couple had set up and started a game of pool. Cue discussions, churlishness and quite justified sulking.

290. Tue 30/1/18: The Carpenters Arms, Harpenden

Beer: Caledonian Edinburgh Castle 4.1%

Steph’s birthday – so out with her folks (and her). The Carpenters Arms should be absolutely idyllic on a quiet Tuesday night – what with the cold outside and two open fires roaring.

The pub is toasty, and the beer is good. The artificial lights seem too bright and too Christmassy. The blokes on the table behind us are too loud, and swearing too much for as genteel a spot as Harpenden… they’re old enough to know better too.

The nearest fire is too close – I’m sweating cobs. The pub seems too busy for a Tuesday evening – 60% less people here would be lovely.

The blokes behind carry on. They appear to be of a socialist bent which, again, one possibly wouldn’t expect in these parts. Nice one comrades… but keep it down a bit.

Having put the world to rights they leave and, ‘cause there’s a dog at the table near the bay windows, Steph’s folks get talking to another couple. General pleasantries. The dog, apparently, is a sweetie. The couple get back to talking, loudly, to each other. They seem like your more stereotypical Harpenden Tories – all Brexit and what Thatcher would have done…

Still, I do like this pub, it’s clearly popular – but I’m pleased to drink up and get out of the heat.

203. Sat 14/10/17: The Bricklayers Arms, Luton

Beer: Nethergate Suffolk County 4.1%
LUTON TOWN 7 STEVENAGE 1

High spirits back at The Bricks; the football went reasonably well.

The pub is quite packed, and so we wander outside and discuss the possibilities of catching the Mlada Boleslav v Bohemians 1905 football match in Czech in a months’ time.

Other than that – discussions revolve around the football and how, despite being prone to a gaff now and again (once or thrice a season) we love our captain Cuthbert. There’s hilarity over the fact that John’s new pet dog has had, and severely chewed, his new £2K hearing aid. There’s then an ongoing critique of one of these bleak Scandi detective TV series – that I’ve never watched.

And with that passing over our heads – Steph and I head off toward Asda.